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24

Nov

Con Ed (Part II)

Last we left off I was on the verge of spazzing out while thinking, why oh why did I give this man my phone number?!? Yes he was extremely hot with his 5 o’clock shadow, wearing his work mans jeans and a hard hat, but clearly those sweaty forearms and big blue eyes were just bait for the trap of a stage 5 clinger.  He wouldn’t stop!! I could’ve been in the bathroom for christ sake and yet Con Ed texted and called way beyond the normal amount of times for a semi stranger. 
After his voice mail pleading for me to call him back as if I was his wife of 20 years that was about to leave him, I was officially no longer in the mood to hang out with CE.

I needed time to sleep on this so I called him, made up some excuse about not feeling well and told him that I’d reach out to him tomorrow to try and reschedule.  He sounded slightly disappointed but wished me well and a good night.  However he didn’t leave it there, he decided to text me 3 more times before the night was over:
 ”Hun, sorry you’re feeling sick let me know if you need me to bring you anything” (no I was not having some stranger bring me a bowl of soup and even worse, know where I live)
I’m here for you hun" (I’m sick, not dying)
Sweet dreams" (I’ll be having nightmares of your endless texts)
I didn’t reply to any of them to avoid adding fuel to this fire of texting. 


I woke up the next morning to a text from him at 7AM!?!?!?  “Good morning hun, hope you’re feeling better, have a great day”.  Ok ok ok, I’ll look pass the fact that I was on your mind at 7AM, what I can’t look past is the fact that you actually texted me this early in the morning! My closest friends, my dad, heck my dear old grandmother doesn’t text me that early, it’s just cell phone etiquette. And yet CE felt that after a couple of drinks and a stalkerish cellphone session, that we were cool like that…. Nooo sir!    I couldn’t bring myself to reply that early so I figured I’d wait at least until I got to work which is a little after 9am. 

I resurface from my train ride into work and the moment my phone had service I got a notification. Beep Beep: You have 1 new text message from Con Ed…. “You ok?”. Why wouldn’t I be, because its 9am and I have yet to reply to your 7am wake up text.  This is where I’ve got to put my foot down.  After time to cool down and think this all over, I finally write Con Ed a message:

"I’m absolutely fine. And I’ve taken so long to call/write back to you because I’m trying to find the nicest way to tell u that your texting has been a bit overwhelming. Besides being busy at work I just don’t think we’re at the point where we need to text and talk  all day everyday. That’s just also not in my personality. I had fun on Saturday with u and would be more than happy to hang with u again but your indecisiveness to choose a place for dinner or activity is off putting. I’m trying to get to know u as well and what you’re about, so when I ask for u to pick a place and you throw the ball back in my court asking me to choose it becomes frustrating. This is all a lot to deal with within the first week of meeting as well. Apologies if this came off as rude those were never my intentions, just to be honest. "

This is all written with the hope that CE gets the point and slows down a bit. To give him a second chance to maybe show me that he can be less needy and more assertive. He writes back immediately apologizing for overwhelming me with his texts and promised to back off a bit and be more decisive. I thank him for understanding and tell him that I’d give him a call later.  Thirty minutes later he writes "can I call you?" Followed by two phone calls that go unanswered.  What’s with this guy?  I thought I was pretty clear in my text, I needed space and would call him later, no room for misinterpretation there.
Over the course of the day I received several other texts from him:
 ”Are you mad at me”, “Am I still in the runnings”, “I think we have a good thing going here, hope you want to see me again”

I’d reach my limit for being annoyed for the day (heck the week) and after much deliberation wrote him a text at the end of the day: 
"No, I haven’t gotten back to you because I’ve been  been really busy and a bit overwhelmed. . I’ve come to realize that now’s not the right time for me to get into anything new with you.. hope you understand, this isn’t going to work, I just don’t want to see u anymore. Take care.". Straight to the point. 
Over the next couple of days I receive a batch of texts and several calls until he somewhat moved on.
And til this day about once a month I still get the occasional "Hey how are you?" text that I dare not reply to.

Lesson learned…. Pay attention to the red flags, they’re there for a reason!

For Part I of Con Ed visit http://itsnotmeitsdefinitelyyou.tumblr.com/post/1544624029/con-ed-part-i